By a staff member who did a web search just before deadline.

Notable quotable from the pages of Bass Lake Beacon, November 2017.

“Something went horribly wrong with one of our frying pans. But it’s all behind us now. We’ve put it on the backburner.” — Clem Brickston, proprietor, Bass Lake Inn-Convenience

“I chalk it up to a reduced decrease in lack of carelessness.” — Vance Global, associate chief, Bass Lake Fire and Emergency Institute

“It’s been a bust the last couple of years. “Right in the crapper. Can I say that in print?” — Cooper Sanderstroms, owner-operator, Cooper’s Coops and Chicken Accessories

“We’ve had two, no, one ribbon cutting in the past two years. I’ve had to sell my private collection of commemorative ribbons. At a loss.”
— Jen Sparkle, Jen’s Ribbon Cutting

“We figured we’d find canoes and anchors. What we found were eyeglasses — reading glasses, distance-vision glasses, bifocals – which I believe help with both reading and distance – sunglasses, even a few pair of beer goggles.” — Webb Foote, local diver