Track practice underway; controversy ensues

By Brock Stafford and Max Fontaine | They openly despise each other

track and field
Alien lanes.

Track & field practice is underway at Bass Lake High School.

Student-athletes have begun preseason drills by running throughout town, for at least 45 minutes, after school hours. Even the shot-putters have trotted out the tradition.

Neil-Diamond Spencerfield, who coaches both teams, is excited about the upcoming season.

“I am!” he said.

Spencerfield, who has coached the boys’ team since 2006, takes over the girls’ unit after longtime mentor Gabardine Steeple-Chase retired in summer 2014, a decision that was largely unreported by local media outlets, including the Beacon.

One Bass Lake resident is less than impressed by the annual spring ritual undertaken by the Canoes.

“Geepers, I almost hit one of them with my pickup when he/she was running a stop sign,” said Ebeneezer Usain-Jenner, 61, of Main Street Avenue. “Same thing just about happened last year. And I’ve never had so much as a speeding ticket. Couldn’t these kids put themselves to better use by picking up brush around town? If they all want to be so fast, that’d whip them into shape, fast. Winter’s over, grow up for once!”

Facebook messages to the person Usain-Jenner nearly-vehicularly struck have gone unreturned.

Brock Stafford and Max Fontaine contributed to this report.

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