By A. Finn Moss | Dedicated mainstay

Guy Soundguy, Bass Lake mayor and soundboard-twiddler for Local Cover Band, Bass Lake’s most enduring cover band, is reportedly non-injured and completely intact, following a van-explosion this week.

Preliminary details fly in the face of early reports and speculation of his alleged untimely demise.

Less than 45 seconds ago, authorities confirmed that Soundguy had been at the scene of the flame-based outbreak the entire time, assisting firefighters from Bass Lake Fire and Emergency Institute as they fought the fire.

Fire institute intern Lucas “Third-degree” Burns has verified that information via Twitter.

“Mayer (sic) was right-hand!” Burns tweeted. “#GS handles a hose like nobody’s business.”

Cause of the fire is still undetermined, said chief investigator Tim Cronkle from Michiana Highway Control.

“We haven’t ruled out foul play,” Cronkle said. “When we do, I’ll call you with details. Goodbye.”

Related stories:

• This event marks at least the second time Soundguy’s health and welfare were in doubt within the past 15 months.
• A Gibson Flying-V within the van was destroyed in the blaze. It will be missed.