By A. Finn Moss | Beacon mystery reporter

A longtime resident of Bass Lake and a occasional columnist for the Beacon has gone missing.

Failed novelist M.I. Angola, 53, was last heard from at around 11 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 21. Nearby residents heard Angola shouting derogatory comments about ex-Beatle Paul McCartney and chucking things off the deck of his house on the west side of the lake.

One neighbor told the Beacon that Angola had been removing boxes and furniture items from his home over the past several weeks, adding that  Angola dodged questions about what was going on.

“We never talked much,” said neighbor Al Schwartz, Bass Lake Poet Laureate and sometime Beacon columnist. “He just growled at me when I asked him what he was doing.”

Rumors have swirled about the reasons for Angola’s disappearance. Some said Angola was fed up with “this hellhole.” Others claim he spontaneously combusted following a weeks-long drinking binge. Still others say he floated into the sky in a weather balloon left behind by his former neighbors, Jarl and Betsy – Johnson Gøèwj¢öfurƛƷ˂ʥērs, Jr., who themselves fled town back in September.

“I think he just blew up,” said a man living in the woods behind Angola’s house. The man, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, said he found a note left by Angola. “It said everything left behind was free for the taking. I got me these nice bath mats and a whole bunch of bottle caps.”

Police were called to look into the disappearance but declined to get involved beyond claiming items themselves.

“Que sera, sera,” said acting Bass Lake Authority Police chief Chiou Yueh. “Check out this sofa I got. Sweet!”